Our Towns

What’s the worst Christmas song of all time? Depends on who you ask.

So I was getting ready to bake some cookies Saturday night for Christmas boxes that I’ll be shipping out this week, and I was looking for some good Christmas music to add to the festivities. I wish I had looked up “worst Christmas songs ever” BEFORE settling on an album. Here are just a few of those lists online.

Paste: The 15 Worst Christmas Songs, Ranked

Slant: 10 Worst Christmas Songs of All Time

Huffington Post: The 17 Best Worst Christmas Songs Ever

WSLS 10 NBC: What’s the worst Christmas song? Every single one of them.

Worst Christmas Songs of All Time, Part 1: Terrible by Very Existence

Rather than go to my old favorites yesterday, I decided I’d find a new (or old) album, just for fun. Some way or another, I stumbled on “A Very Special Christmas”, which came out in 1987. That was the year I graduated from high school, and the artists appeared to be some old faves, so I set about downloading it.

But somewhere along the way, I got sidetracked and instead ended up with “A Very Special Christmas – 25th Anniversary.”

This turns out to be the worst collection of music that I have ever heard, and I found Cheap Trick’s “I Want You For Christmas” particularly atrocious (yes, it’s a holiday remake of “I Want You to Want Me.”

So those are my nominations for worst Christmas album, and worst Christmas songs (there could be others on the album I dislike more, I couldn’t bear to listen to the whole thing).

In looking over these “worst Christmas songs ever” lists, I see some titles that I like:

“Santa’s Gonna Come in a Pickup Truck,” Alan Jackson

“All I Want for Christmas is a Real Good Tan,” Kenny Chesney


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